Finding a Mentor

I find leadership to be one of the most curious subjects – it’s equal parts objective and subjective; there’s both art and science to it. A great leader can be someone with any personality type, in any professional field, and of any gender. But one of the most curious things about it I recently came across in a Brené Brown quote. A renowned sociologist and researcher of leadership and vulnerability said “to me, a leader is someone who holds her- or himself accountable for finding potential in people and processes.” Throughout my career, I have found great mentors and tried to be a great mentor to others and I think to be a great leader, it is essential to find a mentor and cultivate that relationship.

In my former career as a human resources officer for a nonprofit, I encouraged our new team members to find someone to shadow – both to learn the day to day aspects of their specific jobs, but also someone who they found a connection with and could look to for professional guidance. Here are a few things I encouraged them to consider when seeking a mentor.

Be Coachable

It’s easy to get stuck often into thinking that your approach is the best approach. But, dear friend, it’s essential to be a person who can be taught. A possible mentor is going to feel more of a connection with you when they feel that you will take their advice seriously. But, Patrice, what does it mean to be coachable? It means being open to feedback, responsive to change, and able to be a team player.

If this is an area you’d like to improve, check out this article “How Coachable Are You?” from Forbes

Be a Team Player

When I have been approached by colleagues asking me to serve in a mentoring capacity for them, the biggest thing I consider is my experiences with them as a colleague. I want to serve as a mentor to individuals who cultivate connections with other colleagues, who work hard, who are dependable, reliable, and show up for the team. The people with those characteristics, I know will be teachable, relatable and successful in any endeavor. It’s not important to always be the smartest person in the room or the person who solves every problem, but I truly enjoy working with people who can be part of the team in every aspect.

Seek an Authentic Connection

One of my mentors at a large corporation where I worked for nearly a dozen years was someone completely different from me – he was male, a bit older, and came from a different professional field from me. Many people would tell you that mentors should share a demographic connection with you – i.e. if you are a woman, look for a woman as a mentor. Larry proved that common advice wrong – he did not share a lot of demographic connections with me….yet he encouraged my professional development, gave great insight, and provided me with opportunities to grow my skills and leadership. When I wanted to enter into a management position at the company, he helped to guide me and used his professional connections to help me. Our mentoring relationship developed authentically, through me showing up and hustling harder than most people at the company – he saw the potential in me as a young leader in the corporation and encouraged that spark.

When you approach someone to be a mentor, having this type of professional relationship can open up the door for what can sometimes be an awkward conversation. I would encourage you to think of the type of leader you want to be, and to find someone in your professional and/or personal life who is the type of leader you want to be and has the ability to encourage your leadership journey. Let me know how I can support you in finding the mentor of your dreams!

Until next time, take good care of yourself, friend!