Integrating Mindfulness
I’ve always admired those folks who seem to be calm in the
midst of chaos, you know the one – that coworker who seems so peaceful when the
company’s going through a merger; the friend who meditates daily through a
parent’s illness; the spouse who seems to know just what to say to make you
feel better. While I deeply respect those people in my life, I have never been
one of them. For me, and maybe for you, friend, it’s a challenge to maintain a
sense of calm when I know things are not going well. So I’m working to
integrate mindfulness into my life in small ways – maybe you can find some
insight in my words (or just read ‘til the end for some great resources!)
I talk a lot on this blog about having grace for yourself,
for those around you, and living in alignment with your values. I fully admit
that I’m a work in progress around these, but bit by bit, I’m getting better
and stronger at them.
Stop.
In this season of my life, I am busy. I don’t say that as a
badge of honor, merely just a statement of facts. I’m balancing a demanding
career, a 35 year marriage, two adult children, a dog (and grand-dog with her
own Instagram
account) not to mention my rich social life and world travels J Sometimes, I need to
pause – stop – and just take a second to just be. So, in the past I always
would take a walk around the neighborhood or go get a pedicure – and that
served me well for a time. In this stage of life though, I’m learning to just
cease being busy and instead just be. To be silent, to be present, and to take
a moment for myself.
Breathe.
Okay friend, let’s take a deep breath together…..did you do
it? I hope you did. Breath is so cleansing and rejuvenating but a lot of times
I don’t think about it. One of the techniques I’ve learned through mindfulness
meditation is to focus on your breath – acknowledging the thoughts as they
pass, but focusing on the breath that sustains you, that brings air into your
lungs and back out of your body. As the thoughts come, you see them come and
you watch them go. You try not to go down the rabbit hole of “what ifs” and
“how comes” and “whys”, you just move forward.
Have you ever had a bad cold and only want to feel like you
can breathe normally again? We don’t realize how essential our breath is until
it’s obstructed. So today, notice your breath, notice the life affirmations
that come with breathing. And as you exhale, let go of the anxiety and stress
permeating your body.
Observe.
When’s the last time you made a conscious effort to note
what you feel throughout the day? How the laughter of your friend affects your
mood, how your bones creak when you get up after sitting for too long? One of
the most important things I’m learning from incorporating a mindful attitude is
to notice the small things in my life. Truth be told, those small things can
add up over time. A few months ago, I noticed that my hip was a bit tighter
after my morning walk for a few days in a row. By being conscious of this small
change in my body, I was able to seek out an acupuncturist who helped treat
that pain (and my sleep has improved too!). A lot of times we think of
mindfulness as walking around in a blissed out state, which might be your experience,
but sometimes it looks more like an ordinary gesture.
Methods.
I imagine you might say, “that’s all well and fine, Patrice,
but you don’t understand my life. I don’t have the abundance of time to just meditate
and be all observant. I. Am. BUSY!” And I get that, I really truly do. But, as
the iconic fashion designer Diane von Furstenburg once said “the most important
relationship is the one you have with yourself”. Being mindful throughout our
day is one of the best ways we can take care of our relationship with
ourselves. We learn to be at home in our bodies, with our minds, and create a
little space in our lives.
Mindfulness can look like a lot of different things for you –
mindful eating, meditation, yoga, etc. I’ve included some resources below to
help you start, but whatever you decide is right for you, make sure to stop,
notice and observe!
Resources
Mindfulness Meditation
- Bonus – here’s Dan Harris’ 10% Happier podcast
TED Talk: All
It Takes in 10 Mindful Minutes by Andy Puddicombe
- Andy is the voice behind the Headspace app
Calm
App
- The Breathe bubble on the app is one of my favorite quick mindfulness tricks
Mindful Eating (Look for an upcoming blog around this topic!)
What is Mindful Eating?
from Leo Babauta at Zen Habits
Yoga
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